Clintster (pronounced THROAT-wobb-ler MAN-grove ) is a member of the fWc and contributor to both the mainland and Japan. He is a member of the fWc Nexus as well as a devotee of the Cult of [REDACTED] .
General History[edit | edit source]
Clintster was born some time before you were, dear reader. He was watching wrestling back in the 1970's, and remembers seeing Flair, Valentine, and Piper wrestling on Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling .
He used to watch wrestling pay-per-views on scramblevision via his local cable system. During the Attitude Era, his house was Wrestling Central on pay-per-view nights (this time legit ordered). He was following wrestling on the 'net as early as the mid '90s, when he discovered the Medium Rare Raw Report . He was an occasional contributor to the CRZ wrestling website at the end of the '90s.
Clintster currently resides in OTP, Georgia, practicing the delicate art of being a good husband and father. He is looking for work, so if you have any, throw a dog a bone.
FARK history[edit | edit source]
Clintster first appeared on Fark in 2003, where he was looking for a diversion from work on a Long Boring Thursday afternoon. His Boobies came during a thread about the Icy Hot Stuntaz. He first posited himself as a photoshopper, and stuck to those threads with some contributions here and there.
The lure of the Politics tab drew him in during the 2004 Presidential campaign, however, and he became a regular lurker, contributor, and troll-repellant. After the 2008 campaign, however, he began to tire of the trolling, counter-trolling, shadowbanning, pissing, moaning, and general bad vibes emanating from the tab (and that was just from the people he agreed with).
fWc history[edit | edit source]
The Clintster's involvement with the fWc goes back to the early summer of 2012. Looking for a wrestling liveblog, he found a RAW thread in, of all places, the FARK sports tab (because FARK YOU THAT'S WHY! ). He lurked for a couple of weeks before deactivating the cloaking device and contributing. He was just getting used to [REDACTED] and understanding the charm of Cena Cat when the Great Scism happened.
Undaunted, he bonded with some of his fellow n00bs to form the fWc Nexus and settled in as the Arn Anderson of the group. He began to share some of his shoops with the thread and thanked his Maker that there was a group of people that could discuss wrestling while having a good time with it. During CM Punk's heel turn in late summer 2012, he came up with the "Heel Punk is Best Punk" meme. On August 6, 2013, Clintster signed a deal with fWc lurker Dyertek, taking him on as Clintster's manager.
On September 15, 2013, during the FARK Night of Champions thread, Clintster won the FFLM trivia belt in a 2 out of 3 questions challenge, taking the belt from nathanjr. Clintster was able to hold on to the belt through the Battleground PPV (mostly due to it being one of the worst booked cards of the past decade).
The next night, on October 7, 2013, thanks to an elaborate set of shenanigans coordinated with a nasty stomach bug affecting the champ, TheManofPA was awarded the FFLM title in a C-O-N-spiracy not seen since Chris Jericho was stripped of the WCW television title. Later that week, Clintster was seen traveling to Washington to demand that Rep. Darrell Issa (R-CA) hold a special committee meeting to determine the depth of the conspiracy against Clintster (and by way of extension, the People).
Denied an audience with Rep. Issa (R-Douche), Clintster set about on his next step in exposing the conspiracy and regaining redemption, and by redemption he means "the FFLM title".
On October 27, 2013, following the conclusion of the Hell in a Cell pay-per-view, Clintster announced he was taking a hiatus from both the WWE and the fWc, citing the fact that he had lost faith in, and enjoyment of WWE, to the point he could not even enjoy posting about it in the FARK threads. He reappeared the next week in the RAW thread, but it is unclear if he will be able to watch the show without engaging in a ragequit.
On April 29, 2014, Clintster finally achieved the boyhood dream and won the Moss Covered Three Handled Family Gredunza at the 2008 mark. He proceeded to spend the rest of the night sitting on the edge of the bed, holding the Gredunza in his lap and gazing at it, softly uttering the same words over and over again: "My preciousssssss."
During the 2014 Money in the Bank "special event", Clintster was unable to secure the FFLM Trivia Belt for a third time, but due to his spectacular performance (and a well-timed Turkey Television reference) he was able to secure his second-ever FFLM Money in the Bank case.
Titles Won[edit | edit source]
Last Man Standing (11 times)
FFLM Trivia Belt (2 times)
FFLM Money in the Bank (2 times)
Marzipan Mascarpone Meringue Madness (2 times)
Final Thoughts[edit | edit source]
Heel Punk is STILL Best Punk
Hogan shoulda put Sting over at Starrcade 97
I'll still take one Lita over Both Bellas
Clintster hates referring to himself in the third person
And that's the bottom line